June

June

Music & Lyrics by Drew Brody

again last night my awful dream:
fat mannequins attacking me on every side
today i want to crawl into a ball and stay in bed
shut the world away
they don’t need me out there today
i’m still changing i’m still learning, it’s confusing
and uncertain
how i still believe in magic, but i don’t believe in fate

i’m still unsatisfied, i think i know why:
the hole i dug in june, i had to sleep in, in july
now here we are two strangers in a bed
as the walls i painted brown
in candlelight, surround us
you say: “move over”
then something ’bout the moon
and we’ve earned another night here me and you

even so, i brave the nightmares on my own
you want to comfort me i know
it shows
it’s hard for you to say it but baby i know
baby i know

i can’t keep my house clean anymore:
there’s underwear on every chair
and towels on the floor
the fish keep dying off one by one
i bury them at sea
and i lose a little part of me — it sounds crazy
i know their lives are short
but each one gone reminds me
that mortality is not a choice

i swore i loved you before i knew your name
the day i saw you play in the cafe
i’d never heard a song sung just for me
i was hypnotized (and slightly terrified):
we had the same hands, they were the same size
we had the same lips, that sang the same lies
and i stole you for the night
to kiss you in the streetlamp light

and although your songs were bullets to my soul
you need to keep the peace at home
so i’ll go
there’s no need for explaining it baby i know
baby i know

this will be our final night:
this love affair just isn’t fair, you can’t deny
we both know that my head’s not in the game
if i were happy with myself,
i could begin with someone else
but my darling, i’ve got so much work to do
so much to figure out
so i can’t belong to you
i can’t belong to you

and i know you need me open where i’m closed
you need me present where i’m gone
so i’ll go
i’ve hurt you and i can’t change it oh baby i know
baby i know

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